I haven't been involved in the classical music scene in my town for about a year (because of college), and today I got together with my old teacher George for a violin lesson! I was so excited. He really is my most favorite teacher I've ever had. He is extremely witty, and so smart. I am always learning something new! Like, I never knew Mendelssohn was like Mozart, in the way that they were both musical geniuses at very young ages. I also didn't know that Beethoven was like the "rebel" almost, never wearing a wig in the times where you should be wearing one... i.e, George Washington, Mozart. They wore wigs. But Beethoven didn't...because he didn't want to. What a badass. Beethoven also had this idea of how music should be replicating of somewhat an explosive nature, and it really is. I could go on and on using musical terms but this would be more boring of a blog than it normally is, so I won't.
He helped me with my music excerpts for next year's orchestra audition, and then I just got back tonight from a string quartet rehearsal at his house. It was pretty bad. I didn't realize how terrible I got at sightreading. George told me to play the first violin part on a piece, and I did HORRENDOUS!! I'm actually embarrassed how bad I did! He was trying to make me feel better about it, but I know I did so, so bad. You know when you feel absolutely prepared for something, but then once you get there one thing can throw you off and then you are in some weird limbo of confusion/anger? That's where I was during this Mendelssohn quartet. It was so difficult (rhythmically), and then had these jumps (referring to like a low c to a high F.). It was just too much for my small brain, hahaha. I felt bad, because we had to keep stopping. I mean, it wasn't always me but I probably caused someone else to get off. I didn't do very well, I'm kindof disappointed in myself. So I'm just going to practice that music like crazy till I'm solid & ready to go. I don't think we're playing it for anything, but hey. it's still fun. Just to get quartet experience. Since that's what I'm going to be doing in Germany for a little bit I'm sure.
The Dilemma brings up a thought in my head. Just recently, I know a family that the parents are going through the divorce. One of the kids doesn't even blame his dad for it (The dad cheated)... I don't care whatever the circumstances are... It's just an absolute no. Nothing excuses it. Well hey, I guess like father like son. Or even like mother, like daughter. I sure as heck see resemblances in my sister's and my mom's personalities! (They're not cheaters or anything. I'm just saying they have many similarities in personality). People that cheat on people make me sad. I know why they do it though. I tried to put myself in their situation, to completely understand why they would. All I could come up with is that they are missing something in their current relationship that they desperately feel need of. It's not that they don't like the person they're with anymore; maybe they like that feeling of security and permanentness with that person, but they just need something else at that moment. I don't know. I think though that if a person is in that situation, they are absolutely with the wrong person. If you're with the right person, you don't ever feel that way. You don't even feel the need to necessarily look at someone else, if it may be that extreme.
God, what a rant.
I asked my teacher if I should even bother applying for the ysa scholarship next year, and he said no. He was completely honest and that's what I love about George. he knows they are just going to pick the person that is without the most money, and it won't be me. I'm not rich or anything, obviously. But we're not poor. And that's what it takes now to get a scholarship... is to not have money. Not if you're talented, but if you're needing money. Good thing.
xox
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